Learn some fucking English or leave me alone! "Your" is for something that belongs to you, like 'your herpes'. And "you're" is a contraction for "you are", like "you're not sleeping with me".
Instead of just putting in it he asked "will you do the honors?" it was the cutest thing I had ever heard before sex.
Don't ask how, but I'm pretty sure my name is now on a lease to a taco bell franchise in maryland...
I really should sober up and deal with this hangover
It seems to be one of those life decisions I'm perfectly content never making though
Ya bro it was wild. Hey, is latex digestible?
mind if i send you a dick pic? so you can see what she wasn't doing right?
The strip clubs here are like a safari of penis, and I'm gonna bag me a rhino.
and then i signed some dudes back with a turkey hand print in honor of thanksgiving
sometimes when you're high at work you just have to say fuck it and eat the dog treats
In the bath trying to absorb water through my skin because I can't drink it.. That hungover
He simply fell in the fire, rolled out and continued to finish his bottle of vodka. Everyone else instantly sobered up just watching it.
The walk home lasted longer than the sex. He lives in the flat above the bar.
He was on top and as he finished he yelled "I love gold" , so yeah I'm seeing him later tonight
WHO TURNS DOWNA FRESHLY WAXED VAGINA IN A MAIDS COSTUME LITERALLY LAYING IN YOUR BED
You’re about to have a sober threesome with a rando at a Fenway bar?
Randomize
