Let's hustle tonight so we can relax tomorrow
Perfect. Like where your heads at
By relax I mean have sex
hey i know this is weird but does alcohol affect pregnancy tests?
Can you really blame Steve Phillips? He went to Michigan. Plowing fat girls is a 100-level course there.
I just saw a pair of panties stretched over a fire hydrant on campus... I need to get the fuck out of this town
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
I love how all these freshman girls think that they can wear what they wore last summer... freshman 15 at its skankiest
I miss the good ol' days when we would yell at strangers from your balcony while wearing our mexican ponchos in the middle of the day.
what ever happened to our old dealer?
you vomited through the snorkel and onto the back of your head. it was truly amazing
I thought you wanted to talk?
What part of "Lets have angry sex" means I want to talk?
Omg have I shown you my skeezy ex fiancée?
The other one.
my sex drive just dried up, fell out, and is rolling on the floor somewhere.
he went down on me while I ate Oreos. I don't know what caused the orgasm.
What kind of friend would I be if I didn't make you hate things you once loved?
Dude... the time we have in life to be young and trivial is so incredibly short. I think we should drink tonight.
just discovered a semi frightening wound on the side of my head that must have happened last night. if i die of a brain aneurysm, make sure they put "sorry for partying" on my gravestone.
Randomize
