my mouth tastes like poor choices
this guy literally just gave me a gold star sticker for the "stellar" blow job i gave him. ashamed? i think not.
He IMed me 5 times, before my homepage even loaded. This is not gonna work out for me
Oh yeah forgot to mention that I referred to myself as the oral sex heavyweight champion last night
She got drunk on the air plane and pretended to be an elephant for an hour...Atleast the kid behind us enjoyed it.
So heartbroken my rebound has a rebound
Meanwhile I'm working a fucking flute workshop and I'm one high c away from shoving a flute up the asshole of the next passerby
Shut the fuck up. It's not the end of the world. Now come get your asshole bleached with me or we're not roommates anymore.
If my mom's not going to offer me drugs then it's really pointless for me to be here.
I don't remember how I broke my nose last night, but I woke up with dried blood everywhere. Also, you should tell that guy how you feel.
I despise everything about her. Except her tits.
She was doing drunken zumba and screaming "FUCK YOU I HAVE MY OWN STYLE!" at the TV
Life update: This fucking MacBook repair guy called me over last night for a booty call and he didn’t have a condom OR a bed
Keep two things coming: nudes and puppy pictures
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
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