Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
She transformed our coors light pitcher we stole from the bar into a fruit basket...
i'm in workout clothes. this is progress.
We didn't need to cut her off. I'm pretty sure the lit candle she almost drank would have done it for us
thank you for reminding me that I stumbled into a public place drunk at 9am wearing a chicks pants.
Because once my penis is in motion, it stays in motion unless another force acts upon it.
If I don't survive tonitght I would like to thank you for the ricekrispy treats. I am majestic
If you're wondering why you have playpen balls it's because we stopped at chuckie cheese on the way home.
The novelty of Nekkid Straight Roommate has faded.
He just said his penis sings like Mariah Carey...Im going with drunken.
I'm a college student and my dad gets more ass than I do..... do you see a problem here?
It's truly amazing how much porn I can get in while my phones at 1% battery life.
This is what we get for finishing a whole box of Franzia by ourselves
Hiking for a first date sounded like a good idea in theory because there was absolutely no possibility of me blacking out. In practice, I'd rather black out than go through what I just went through.
The sex was totally worth how awkward its gonna be for the next few weeks
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