I think im going to throw up on grandma
today is like waiting for pizza day in elementary school, but with sex added
he thanks me after handjobs.
you found the perfect man.
he has the hands of the vagina gods.
You remember the guy that busted in waving a tazer at everyone yelling "get the fuck outta my crib"?
yeah you don't forget that shit easily
We ended up crawling out from our hiding spot and playing pool with him once he calmed down. His name is Marcus. I got his email.
YOU GOT KINKY WEIRD ICE CREAM HEAD ON FRIDAY DONT EVEN COMPLAIN.
This is a whole new generation of premature ejaculators
I smell like a skunk, but I'm okay with that.
I'm so festive that I used my jack o lantern bucket as a just in case barf bin
i need something from you. video yourself doing naked jumping jacks and send it to me. it will make me smile
I hooked up with the sexiest couple in the LAX BATHROOM IN THE CHANGING FAMILY ROOM HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAA
U NO SLUT. YOUR HEART IS JUST FREE.
in the past 2 days I've ruined2-3 lives, made 2 men quit the bar, started a Wednesdays only affair, ended it, ruined that engagement and had my tires slashed by a jealous bouncer. please stop letting me out....
I apparently ooze single. The second I left his house after break up sex five of my old booty calls text me
I've been eaten out in coupes, sedans, trucks, suv's, you name it. If I can do it in a smart car, you can do it in a vw beetle.
I knew you were the expert on doing it in public. You need to get paid for your advise
Randomize
