So he sent me a text that said "say hi to your vajayjay for me"
Was there any message he wanted you to relay to your asshole?
His hands were made for my vagina.
He keeps the condoms in his bible. I guess stairs or elevator, we're getting to hell one way or another.
Yes, she did suck your dick in the bathroom to wake you up.
im breathing rainbows and everyone is talking in bubbles whatever you gave me give me more
Dude i don't know we had to beg the bouncer to let us in because you were bleeding everywhere and he saw you run into a dumpster
I will always remember that night by waking up in that tablecloth the next morning
How do we turn this unicorn pinata into a bong?
You rubbed your penis on my leg and said "people have paid for this kind of action"
Tried to dodge fire in poncho. Fell through fence. Blood everywhere.
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
I have nothing to say for myself. When 2chainz comes on at the bar all bets are off.
So yeah, turns out I enjoy vaguely public group sex. Who knew?
And he's back on taking these stupid testosterone supplements to kickstart him back into working out. And they just make him angry and horny all the time. I'm like great, just in time to meet my whole family for Christmas.
At least he uses his lack of impulse control for chaotic good instead of chaotic evil
Randomize
