I had another sleeping on concrete incident.
She pulled a cheeseburger out of her purse. I have missed her so much.
She sucked her thumb until she was 17. It's like my dick was born to be in her mouth.
i asked if you wanted help changing your sheets after you threw up in bed. you politely declined. i take no responsibility after that.
He gave me a hug and said "He doesn't deserve you, Anna. Your boobs are great, and I'd fuck you anytime. Any. Place." I need a new 'gay' friend.
I always forget that visiting my hometown is like a who's who of ugly people.
it's only monday and im already failing all my classes. i give up. tequila tuesday is my only friend.
Our fuck buddy relationship took a turn for the worst after we were drunk and I punched him in the face when he asked for a three some with my best friend.
got one for peeing in public....called the cop a donut dunking communist...should be a fun court appearance
I took Xanax and it did nothing to me. First sign I'm crazy and actually need it.
This is three metal detector wands away from being the strangest porn I have ever been in the audience for.
We may not see eye-to-eye on much, but I'm definitely willing to let you see eye-to-vagina again.
I took it as a sign from the lord above that she wanted me to creep on these men.
You were lost on foot. Texted us and told us that N*Sync couldn't save you, and then you "met Jesus" in your car.
I'm not gonna lie. I need sex like plants need water right now. I just need the dick.
Randomize
