hey call me
can't. in the shower.
... and this is probably why your phone does not work half the time.
They totally botched my boob job. My tits look like they're are winking.
do u usually make out with people before telling them your name???
Seriously, I would hit on barney the dinosaur right now if it meant I was going to get laid.
You're the host. Of course you wear the diaper. It's like wearing the pants.
So what if i'm late to spanish tomorrow. who the hell cares. i don't even speak spanish.
The football player sitting in front of me just googled himself. Only 4 articles came up. That's why he plays at Utah State.
Itd be like fucking a waterbed thats been locked in a barn for two years.
Where in the FUCK do you get your analogies
Getting my nails done with Diana... I'm going for the keep your friends close and the girl who's dating the guy you want to fuck closer
At least I got to make out with you a little before you proposed.
I would bite a mans dick off for a chocolate milk.
Sneezing cum all over the table was not the highlight of the family reunion if that tells you anything
Lol he touched my butt after his grad party and a shooting star went by. No kidding. My ass is mystical.
Like these jerks could have told me it wasn't a video call, I wouldn't have put on pants.
I wore my lizzie mcguire socks to the bar last night. Because that's how i get all the ladiez
Randomize
