nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
If your 8 lb baby was ham it would serve 6-8 people
i went to throw her on my bed and threw her straight in to my bike
Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
My bed became a clown car for his family....I'm not ready to get married
Seriously. There are at least 10 other people drinking at the bar with me at 10:40. Im justifying it with the fact that I've been up since 5am.
4 girls from the bar, me, strip basketball. here. NOW
My pubes were yanked out by the root when they got caught in the condom. I think it's time for a bikini wax.
A girl told me I was her "alcohol spirit animal" tonight. Somehow I think my whole life was secretly building up to this moment
First highlight of the semester: campus safety caught me peeing in the dirt parking lot by kappa. Then as they were about to write me up, they recognized me, laughed, and left.
I do feel like I owe you an apology for trying to fuck your dad last night but in my defense everyone knows I shouldn't drink tequila.
Went to bed in my room fully clothed, woke up naked in the kitchen with the dog looking unamused.
We need to get walkie talkies for when we're drunk so if we are at different parties or lost we can talk
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
This whole brainwashing thing is easy!
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