WTF I just almost got ran over by a fucking cop!!!!!!
LOL you shoulda thrown yourself in front for money. Fucking cops!
woke up with ski boots on and a kayak in my room... birthday successful? i'd say so
I returned the dress. When they asked for the reason for return I said, 'I don't deserve to wear white'.
we played dirty jenga the drinking edition... some girl really just broke a rib? how do we even go this hard
also, i am in no position to judge as my life choices today went along the lines of "YAY VODKA". for breakfast.
I went to the bar saying i wasn't going to drink that much. I forgot sobriety might as well be some mythical creature when you're with Holleey
I'm scared to see what happens if we keep winning like this. I don't think there enough livers for every one after the season is over.
As its breast cancer awareness month, I'm going to do my part by making everyone aware of my breasts
I mean I'm screaming I love the gays in the middle of Bart so yeah
I just ironed my gstring.. this is please fuck my brains out on a whole new level.
I think I was just hit on by Jesus Christ. This is not okay. Bad Touch. I NEED AN ADULT!
Calm the hell down, it's just stoner Bob.
My legacy here is being that tiny blonde girl that threw someone down and shouted "Fuck your face, I'm Dee Dee Ramone."
Considering all of my stomach contents ended up in my center console, I'm a bit peckish.
I swear if you help me with this I will eat you out and buy you all the Taco Bell you want.
Soo I'm in the trunk of a car drunk about to jump on trampolines. My life rocks!
Randomize
