Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
We walked because you started screaming when you finally realized he wasn't Ben Bailey and it wasn't the Cash Cab.
You only like me because I'm a challenge
You already blew me
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
We somehow managed to get the sumo-wrestler costume into the washing machine, but I don't think the cupcake icing completely came off... And it still smells like tequila.
You kept asking the bartender if you could "buy a dollar".
If it makes you feel any better, I had my finger up some guy's butt today... Dominatrix training, ya know...
They sleep with other people as long as there is no oral. Logic and reason were thrown out the window a long time ago with them.
Is it weird that the best sex I've ever had was to Barbara Streisand's Christmas album?
I wrote myself a letter, like I think drunk me wants to be pen pals or something
Were you citizens arresting people again last night?
I feel awful. The bartender added me on Facebook and there's chips all over the bathroom floor
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
I legitimately thought he died. I even called his mom at 3am and told her. Im done with vodka.
Are you sure you found YOUR underwear?
Randomize
