So drunk, too bad you don't want this
The more my room-mate speaks, the more I notice that she was home schooled.
The world would have a new energy source if someone would just take a blacklight to the backseat of that slut's car
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
It only takes once for you to drunkly piss on a chick for her to lose interest in you.
They had an entire room dedicated to passed out people. It was like a dogpile of cross faded toddlers drooling on each other.
She is feeding us popcorn out of her bra
told weddin planner we wanted to work in ceremonial body shots before vows. she hasnt reponded yet...
This is all my moms fault. She shouldn't have encouraged my weird fascinations as a child
He came to my house drunk at two a.m., got in the hot tub, refused to get out until he smoked a blunt, and said "That's what brothers and sisters are for."
Would you be mad if I just used the argument "I'm allowed to say that, my best friend is a lesbian"?
Never. I'm proud to help you win arguments.
like i literally can feel my uterus getting frustrated at me for not being pregnant.
My dad just accidentally taught me how to make fake IDs. I love my life.
I've been there a week.. I'd rather all my coworkers not know that I'm already sleeping with my boss.
We inadvertently arrived at the strip club on Bear Night. The dancers all look like young Santa Claus and there's a buffet....
Randomize
