I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
oh. my. god. the guy i hooked up with last night is currently wearing a dress.
get your tongue out of his mouth and answer your phone. if your not doing more than making out i'm gonna be so pissed. i'm about to sleep in your car bitch
and he says: but we did find out that your ovaries have never released eggs. first thing out of my mouth: so i didnt really need to take the morning after pill so many times in college?
not the response he usually gets im sure.
He IMed me 5 times, before my homepage even loaded. This is not gonna work out for me
he can show you his cooooock\nshining, shimmering, splendiddddd
Well I found you sipping ron diaz out of a child's dinosaur cup while sticking your fingers in the guy's fish tank and watching the "pirahnas" snap at your finger and laughing
Leaving your birthday party to engage in a threesome IS allowed. I checked the rule book.
Hey, this is Travis. I just so intelligently deduced that I am in a college dorm somewhere in western oregon. Probably WOU, based on the process of elimination.
i love when the champions come out to play im bringin the shock collar this weekend
I'm back here naked if anyones wondering
I know. But whatever I'll just eat cold pizza and play with my cats by candlelight
There are so many things that would come back to haunt me if I ran for President someday.
like that video of you mad stoned vomiting in the bdubs parking lot after going to a pizza buffet screaming how you needed to make room for froyo
Wat
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
Oh, and apparently I was butt ass naked and walked into the room where anna was skyping her dude in afghanistan and said "This is happening."
Randomize
