drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
Driving out to Plano is like driving away from your twenties
She told me that she had to rub her face against me because she was part cat.
or how I got to mom's but there is vomit on my shoes. I never thought i'd be recapping with her.
Let me just say....i'm sorry about setting your carpet on fire. I had no idea that the paper towel would burn that quickly.
I meant to thank you again for giving up a potential interracial threesome to come to my party. I'm glad you stayed!
Get your penis over here NOW. emergency
I renamed his cat Jeff last night. Well I spray painted it on him.
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
You need to call dibs on the blond with the tits. It's your birthday.
Haha hell yea
Because if someone gets to see those.. It should be you. It's like God telling you Happy Birthday.
He left his cock-ring in my truck.
Consider it a gay sex souvenir.
It's no shave November. This is our time.
EITHER I'M HIGH OR JUST REACHED A NEW LEVEL OF SINGLE FEMALE SADNESS BECAUSE THIS BROWNIE IS GIVING ME ORGASMS
This pedicure right now is the most physical I've been with a guy all month
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