spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
she called me screaming that i shouldn't ignore her phone calls, because she's not trying to get me to hang out with her and she doesn't want to be my girlfriend, she just wants sex.
what did you do?
i asked her out. that's so hot.
I wanted to google "huge banana" but I'm pretty sure all I'd get is dick pictures.
You thought that the "chillable" logo on the box wine was referring to a city in italy.
Wat the fuck dude ketchup in my bong???
How is it possible that I am in a completely different city, and there are 2 dudes here that I've banged? How????
We both paused during sex to do the clap during the Friends theme song. Soulmates.
bro, your right, i shouldn't feel embarrassed about taking shots from a penis-shaped ice sculpture
If I have to strap one on and give it to you good, you will not die revirginated. That's friendship.
We always end up having sex in random places after class. I need to stop letting this dude borrow my pens.
Her ass is the reason I still believe in a higher power
There are two guys dressed like Spartans from 300 at this bar and they're making out and I needed you to know this
The Stanley Cup Final is killing me. I can't go to work drunk again.
Having sex with him is like yoga. I do it in the morning and then can't walk for three days afterwards.
I'm always down for nudity.
Randomize
