just walked out of chelsea's house and saw cameron slapping his dick against her car. cant even make this shit up if i tried.
you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
I drank almost a whole fifth last night. Woke up with blood everywhere wearing a "stereotype this" tshirt. How fitting
Should study in library more often, procrasturbating is less of an option.
I just heard someone say "gosh-darnit" and they didn't have a southern twang. I worry for New York.
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
She either was great at sex or I finished the whole bottle of svedka my self
She's popping painkillers like they're tic tacs and singing the soundtrack to dreamgirls. It's you're turn to babysit her.
The best part about drinking boxed wine is you can blow up the bag and use it as a pillow
I feel like he better crank it up to level RG IV tomorrow. It's the fucking playoffs.
Dry heaving on campus is my new low. Also, go pats
Vasectomy results are in. No swimmers in the water. REPEAT. No swimmers in the water. Come help me harness my new found super-power
YOU BETTER TOUCH MY NIPPLES TODAY
I've finally done it. I finally achieved my lifelong goal of becoming that awkward lesbian in high school who went on to have sex with more women than any of her male classmates.
She's throwing a party for a guy that just got out of rehab?
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