I promise you 4 toothbrushes taped together and lube does not do the trick
I'm playing the Jersey Shore drinking game by myself at my mom's house. Things like this are not okay after college.
Should I be alarmed that you're a regular enough at a bar to show up in sweatpants?
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
I vaguely remember making out with his tattoo (?) and giving him an awesome massage and then I passed out on his floor. Shrug
It's my 3rd annual 21st birthday party. Disney themed. There will be blood.
I just watched some guy take a shot of jack Daniels, chase it with a shot of ciroc & then violently rip his pants off. You have to come here.
Is it bad that I'm tracking my period with Instagram pictures?
How do you initiate sexting are u supposed to be like yo I'm peeing and eating a clif bar and texting and thinking about you naked all at the same time
I literally stopped banging her when my ESPN app alerted me that the Spurs had won. That's how much I hate Lebron. I would rather watch him cry in the post game interviews than get it in
Dude, who WASN'T thinking of motorboating her?
I honestly don't understand how your night went from singing a touching rendition of Africa to an angry political rant to low key trying to find a frat boy to bang to doing dishes to yoga
The creeper at the bar just realized we have the same birthday and bought me four beers already. He walked off so I took his change and dashed, i'm bringing the case over now.
All of a sudden he got that look on his face and ran to the dance floor and started fist pumping to Rihanna that kind of night
Not having a reliable dick in is getting expensive. I’ve had to replace 3 vibrators since Mike and I split up
Randomize
