singing james blunt while drunk. tell me thats not wonderful
everytime he calls himself the maxipad master i can't help but wonder what costume that would involve.
a pedometer??? no beatles?Steve jobs just took a dump in CA and it landed on my heart
We did it and he fell asleep and I was bored so I decided to go back to the party...is that bad?
no guy is ever going to take you seriously as a potential marriage prospect unless you learn to swallow
so all the bums hang out by my new store, they have a leader we call king bum... He got dethroned by police today for choking out a hooker. The bum heirarchy is in shambles right now.
Ya well my good-girl image was pretty much blown when he found out I'm going to jail soon.
You do realize that you're sleeping with a man who is part of a gay harem, right?
Is it bad to get into the ocean at night? i always thought sharks hated the smell of vomit after drinking
like teasing for 28 minutes, then the very last 2 minutes is where is ALL goes down. I'm talking, rings off, stable sitting position, hand job madness.
Ripped lines in the bathroom before my presentation.. Got bonus marks for my enthusiasm.. This is why I love drugs
Trying to figure out if the guy I'm with right now is the same guy I met spring break
Oh duude it is the guy from spring break! Awk.
How bad is it I'm looking at his cock while waiting to see my therapist?
We were drunk at 3am with no food. I sent him to the lobby with ninety cents for like a bag of chips and I swear on my life he came back with a meatball sub
...did you ask him where he got a meatball sub at 3:00am?
He just kept mumbling something about being a hunter/gatherer
Oh AND he got us two bags of chips.
How was that girls surprise party last night?
Got absolutely destroyed tried to put somebody's leather jacket on and make out with their mother. You know.. the norm
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