margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
Her vagina should come with caution tape.
This concert is like a reunion of all my bad sex.
So I had to explain to her that pussy doesn't mean a cat
Give me a heads up the next time you BBM me a voicenote of you cumming so I'll make sure not to play it while in the car with my parents. Miss you too.
Okay, who took a picture of their pubes shaved into a dragon on my phone and made it the background?!
The next time i black out make sure i remove the ping pong balls from my weave. Especially before my first day of classes.
Somehow she is more off limits now than when she was his girlfriend
Can rosie odonnell just not be a lesbian? Shes stressing me out, knowing we bat for the same team.
I'm so drunk I forgot what to do to go pee.
there is a naked boy in my bed & you just need to kick him out because i do NOT want to see him when i'm sober.
I just made the same noise looking at my salami sandwich as I do hooking up with you.
She really wants to hug you. With her vagina.
It's official we're now working from home permanently. I'm getting paid to have sex and sandwiches. I hit the lottery.
Randomize
