I'm so fucking centered right now
I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
yay, now i'm not the only homewrecker.
yeah but i stopped sleeping with him after i found out he was married.
I have sucked so much dick this week I think I am going to start sweating semen
i suspect the closest i'll get to a valentine this year is a 16 year old on chat roulette asking me to show my tits. step up from last year, i guess.
And I'm ok with his balls touching my ass
We should start a Help That Bitch Out Fund and split the donations evenly between you two.
i think dick pics are a sign of a sexual renaissance
I may or may not have definitely said the words "how do I put this beer in my purse without looking like an alcoholic" last night.
I'm gonna give the church their tithe, and the rest is a down payment on boobs.
I asked him to help me break in the space ship aka my bed.
I almost stopped mid bj to let him know I appreciated his balls being nice to look at/have my face near. But I didn't know if that would ruin, or improve the moment.
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
I feel like any time there's that much rope, lingerie, and horse masks on the ground, it's safe to say it was a great night
What you have to understand is that our lives aren't a disappointment so much as they crashed and burned with lethal doses of radiation and dog shit.
Randomize
