I would blow Magic Johnson for a pack of lucky strikes right now. Post-hiv.
so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
Just passed a Taco Bell Taco Supreme, still in its wrapper, laying in the grass. I'd like a moment of silence.
May it rest in peace.
naw. unless you want me to sit in a corner, not understand english and eat all of your cheese then i don't think it's a good idea.
he tried breathing fire using moonshine and a roman candle. would not have believed it unless i actually witnessed it.
I can't remember where my feet are. All I can see are colors, and all I can feel is terror. The lollipop was a bad idea.
The girls at the police department photocopied my drinking ticket and told me to frame it and hang it on my wall. Then they gave me a free muffin and told me to party smarter next time.
Surveying the reception hall and I'm fearing the worst possible thing that could ever happen...this might be a dry wedding.
.,.,you might have to leave
I woke up wearing my panties and an eyelash, soo I'd say your birthday was a success.
If I had a dollar for every straight boy that questioned their sexuality because of me, I would live a comfortable middle-class life.
I wish I had a clear image of the dude who was sucking on my tit outside the bar last night
I see the guy who's been trying to get me to let him eat my ass became engaged on Facebook today; would framed screen shots be an appropriate wedding present?
He was gone for 5 minutes, opened the car door and said, "Don't eat my shit." and dropped Chipotle on the passenger seat. He was gone for another 10 minutes and came back with Coldstone. That stoned.
no, it was more of an i-don't-think-he-even-knows-what-a-clitoris-is, bad.
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