just survived the first fart of the relationship.
All I remember is yelling at him to admit he liked Bon Jovi, then accusing him of giving love a bad name.
Hard to imagine a reason apart from blow jobs that I'm awake at 530 am.
his dick is like his red hair, amazing but useless
white shorts are a girls way of saying "im ready to fuck cuz its not my time of month"
I might scale it back and go as an investment banker. Which is the exact same costume as James Bond on LSD. I just introduce myself differently.
basically theres shrimp everywhere. splattered on the walls, in the carpet, its bad. ohh theyre never gonna get the smell out.
Before I roll over explain to me why you're naked and on my floor.
and here comes the time of my day when I haw to convince a guy to drive my cape and my handle to my dorm.
Me: 10% human, 90% poor drunken life choices.
I gave him head during Pitch Perfect 2, I felt like the Bella's were cheering me on with their back up tunes
I'm excited for him and his new girlfriend. I'm just going to miss his penis is what I'm saying.
We need to find out what drug we took so we can take it everyday from here on out
Can you send me the picture of me licking the cows udders?
you should just get a floor plan of your dorm and start checking off rooms.
Randomize
