Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
I'm at a crab and wine festival with my dad. He just introduced me as his girlfriend to all of his co-workers. I am so drunk I thought he was serious.
good penises are hard to come by.... must be the economy...
Dude you just tried to have a one night stand with my ex girlfriend while we were trying to put you to bed upstairs.
but that still doesn't explain how i woke up on the couch down stairs.
Vanessa Carlton's songs would be so much better if she was pretty
im flying all the way to minnesota to see him for four days... cutest-best-friend-reunion or most-epic-booty-call-ever?
who says it cant be both...
Wydf in so deruk i just dowwned a packet if salt waitibg for food at del taco
I was actually high enough at that point that I was just casually following your glowing footsteps like in Avatar while we ran from the cops.
The fish's death was accidental. We all said a few words at his funeral. Roomie wanted to play only the good die young as he swirled down the toilet bowl
open bar reception. dayglow. pray for me
i feel like my tongue has its own mouth, and that mouth just bit its tongue and is clenching its teeth.
Please show REO speedwagon ur boobs for me.
I find it fascinating that she'd be more comfortable with her mom finding out she submits dirty disney confessions on tumblr than about her secret email account she uses to chat with dutch and brazilian strangers.
My night ended with a French cab driver offering me his sperm free of cost.
I wish the guy in the stall next to me would stop moaning while taking a dump.
I wish you'd stop texting me from the toilet.
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