so i saw this homeless guy this morning yelling at a pay phone like chewbacca.
That's what you get for being in filth-adelphia.
Just cropdusted the office
I can only be a whore so many days outta the week.
Samesies
Resolution for 2011: blow jobs are a privilege, not a right.
Most sexually ambiguous night of my life. Kept switching from the NBA finals to the Tonys.
You guys better make it up to the cabin in time for mud wrestling on Saturday. I'm not kidding. You know when I joke, and now is not one of those times.
Yeah. I've decided no relationship can survive me shoving my boobs in the guys face
Yea. Some girl set a laundry machine on fire. She's not getting married.
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
Dude too much vodka. I think I just puked up my heart
That's what you get for taking that guy home. The god of sluttiness is frowning upon you.
As the cops are taking us away I see the strippers taking our DD backstage.
We had a One Night Stand 6 months ago but he just Facebook invited me to his wedding. Who the fuck does that.
Um. Did you take a picture of me with a giant dildo after we went bowling?
Was so high at one point last night that while showering I was worried that using too much hot water would slow down our Internet.
I dont understand why so many people are content staying in and avoiding alcohol and sex
Randomize
