I'm in a room alone pouting because I got the wrong nachos at taco bell.
Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
I need to make a 'no kissing' rule for my casual hookups during cold season...this cold is so not worth it.
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
Gosh, I don't even have that. Let alone someone to tie me up and whip me with Twizzlers.
Dude, did you really "knight me" and tell me I had permission to bang your sister last night?
I'm still in my ugly sweater and underwear drinking coffee next to a plate of assorted treats we stole from the party. I got a new sweater by the way, its shoulderpad-y and looks like a news anchor got thrown up on by Liberace. I'm pretty proud.
shes making a cheerios necklace using dental floss 'just in case' she gets the munchies later
I'm all dressed in my outfit from last night, and I'm not even the sluttiest person in Walmart right now. God bless Miami.
At this point in job hunting, I'm willing to become a leather daddy if it means some sort of income.
You're the only guy I know who could convince a lady at the pharmacy to trade you her pain pills for your antibiotics.
if it makes you feel any better you looked really comfortable while you were sleepin in the closet, atleast according to the pictures i woke up with on my phone
I feel like I have the I just lost my virginity face and everyone at the grocery store knows it.
It doesn't matter how nice the shirt you wore to the bar was, you still shouldn't have worn it to a job interview
you poured beer in your mouth so you could be a beer pong cup for her to drink out of/make out with
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