we should go somewhere reaaaaaal shady
you have to be so drunk to ignore a taser
James and whatshisface bought me drunks. I am drinks.
I just had a formal request to dress as a boyscout for my meeting with Legal on Friday. From Legal. Time to go home.
i would bitch about being this hungover, but honestly im just happy to be alive after this weekend
Side note, we are 25 fighting over our sophmore year RAs Drunk facebook attention
I'm not holding out much hope. She met me in a nighclub when I was arguing with the cigarette machine
Just got a blow job while taking my online quiz. How is life in the dorms treating you?
Roommate is eating a chimichanga, watching Dr Doolittle 2 and weeping. His Tuesday hangovers make me feel better about my life.
Was behind a guy going 20 for 4 miles I'll be there as soon as the universe quits fucking me
How do I respond to this?! It's not easy to say "you're hot & the sex was good, but outside the bedroom you scare me"
My legacy here is being that tiny blonde girl that threw someone down and shouted "Fuck your face, I'm Dee Dee Ramone."
So is it your turn now to pretend like dating someone else would stop us from fucking?
Let he who has not made drunken spaghetti at 3 a.m. cast the first stone.
He's a freak. Not like "freak in the bed" freak but like "eats glue in the weekends" freak.
Randomize
