How's tricks little girl?
Trix are for kids, old man.
Did you ever notice the eye of Sauron looks like Lindsay Lohan's vagina?
the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
Signed everyone in my dorm up for free samples of astroglyde. Took me an hour. Happy new years!!!!!
And as far as being fat goes I just did like 20 minutes of p90x and now i'm eating frosting out of the container....
I'll throw in a blow job for your kind ways. Or another booty call. I'm poor and not very imaginative. This is all I have to offer- the unicorn like wonders of my vagina.
No she had like 2 shots and started ironing her clothes and whispering random shit in my ear
until he told me my vag was like a juicy apple and he loved eating it, yes, i really did think we were both sober.
He said you stopped mid-fuck, called fives on his dick, walked out to grab another drink, and came back.
Duuuuuuuude, I need you to sleep with my girlfriend so I can tell you both to move out
Would it be weird to jack off in the hospital?
He was asleep with his head on a windowsill and you were petting his head, then you almost left the kitchen and then went back to pet him some more.
Didn't have the heart to tell him that while he was eating my ass I was laughing, not moaning, into the pillow
Don't go to sleep yet I need your Mexican roots. Can you come make guacamole
well i don't know if 30 seconds is exactly a good time but at least he bought me breakfast
Randomize
