it seems as if every mistake i've ever made in life i've had an errection in one hand and a bud light in the other
we've reached the level in our friendship where i don't think he would rape me
his internet history is a lot of porn, how to make a hovercraft and side-effects of jacking off too much
currently walking past a fire hyrdrant with a hose already attatched.. this could be dangerous..
I wish my period boobs were my regular boobs.
he squeezed my boobs like he didn't know what else to do with them, then turned down head...
told you he was gay.
And then i had a penis in each hand. It was magical.
It starts with an S and ends with arah just gave me a bj.
My sister was crawling her way home and kept asking us to carry her,then she insisted on grabbing at our ankles til she passed out, how was your night?
Just played slippy cup. Flip cup plus slip n slide. What did you do with your fourth of july?
Im laying on the couch wishing someone was here to pour wine in my mouth. I need an alcohol IV
You go to bars with sophisticated older men, I steal lawn ornaments. Priorities
Was i rolling around in a parking lot last night
I just didn't expect to have anal in a retail store at 9 AM on a Tuesday.
You're like a care bear with a big cock & a sexual prowess that would put the mighty Thor to shame.
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