I just saw grafitti that read "Mug The Fart Eater". Really, Memphis? That's all you've got?
I wish I could rss feed the hooker ads on craigslist because it looks suspicious that I check craigslist every hour.
Starbucks introducing alcohol. i hear angels singing.
Sorry if I'm being weird. I'm dipping doritos in cabernet.
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
Either I'm tripping balls or my dog has super powers.
but im not going to tell the owner of the penis of my dreams how to wear his hair.
dude when I get home wanna help me fulfill my dream of smoking a bowl out of my saxophone?
I was jumping over your garbage can screaming "Im a snow cat!!" ..Who wouldn't want to see that?
she's just been through a whole lot lately. When the crazy starts leaking out we give her vodka and lock her in the room with all the pillows.
so that's what that room is for...
I don't know what to say to that. All I know is my vagina is trying to jump through the phone.
I forgot that places existed where drinking on Sunday is frowned upon. It's just so unreasonable.
I almost got on a bus to Langley Air Force Base. 99% sure that's not where I wanna be.
Oh it's tea and biscuits for everyone. An possibly pink eye
He just told me my boobs made up for all the bad things that had ever happened to him. I'm definately having sex with him again.
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