You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
You remember correctly you did get a golf cart ride out but it wasnt because you were special. You were so smashed you were screaming tiger at random golfers in the middle of there backswing.
Just threw up in airport security. Happy holidays.
I just jerked it so loud the neighbor banged on their floor. maybe my wife got the point
It's pretty bad that I know he's opening his door from the way it squeaks because I have snuck out of his room so many times this semester...
Having a race with the dryer. Seeing who can get drunk/dry clothes faster.
Drunk you assumed that me saying I thought squirrels were cute meant for you to trap one in my car by luring it in with ham. You're going to hell for this.
I was picked up from his hotel room at 5 a.m. and came home with my panties and jäger in a McDonald's bag so the desk attendant wouldn't judge me. This is what single at 25 is about.
IM GOING TO SIT ON YOUR FACE AND CHANT 'I BELIEVE THAT WE WILL WIN'
STOP FUCKING TELLING PEOPLE ABOUT THAT TIME THAT GUY CAME ON MY FACE WHILE I WAS ASLEEP!!!
Update: I spent 10 minutes trying to fish out a rogue vagina weight.
I was totally going to fuck him and then his friend walked in brushing his teeth, whipped down his pants and started doing the windmill. Ultimate cock block
If you were to to ask if I just hid 4 shooters or Jameson it my bra and panties the anwer would be yes, yes I did
Your parents are gone and we haven't fucked in their bed... why?
Randomize
