Sponge bath it is.
Omg. Just talked to a semi driver from nebraska. Got her truck stuck. Gave her and her riding buddy a glass of vodka and a cig. YES.
last night i was so high that when a homeless person asked me for a dollar, i responded: dolla dolla bill ya'll.
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
Just shaved my vagina. It's been so long I forgot what it looked like. You need to come over right now.
I walked in and she was doing shots, betting the managers if any of the customers would notice, and screaming that nothing would ruin her Saturday night. Say what you want, I like working with my sister.
When I start carrying a bottle in my hand, jumping from boat to boat with a grenade horn. YOU should know this isn't going to turn out well.
Everyone already knows you're a drunk, they understand.
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
Is it bad that I don't ask for names anymore? Just added "gold-chain-wearing hotel guy" to my list under "minivan 3way" and "funny-tasting gym guy."
This strip club is mediocre. Talent is fine. Fung shui is bad.
Just wanted to share my unfortunate vagina news in the hopes that it would make your vagina feel better about itself.
Dont ask questions just say words. where can i find plan b?
Way to fucking accidentally drunk dial me while you're talking to and buying other girls drinks. Don't call me.
My dad is clearly baked off his ass. He almost sat on moms cat in front of her, zoned out while staring at it and said he wondered what it was thinking about. Now he's dragging everything from the livingroom into the garage. Moms not happy.
It's so obvious he's evil. I mean, would a non-evil person have facial hair like that?
Randomize
