No, we're smoking outside. We're hot boxing the world.
I don't understand why we need a holiday to become more aware of boobs...
your cum blends into my yellow sheets :/
do you know how hard it is to sit through a 3 hour movie with someone and not fuck them?
defrosting a beer in the microwave. no sparks so far.
Did I tell you I had a charge show up for $36 on a credit card I haven't used in 6 months from Wild Wings? It was that night we slept across the street from the bar.
He told me I was a pleasure to arrest. That's the 2nd time I've heard that.
You turned byob into bring your own shit show. Good work.
she asked me where ive been her entire life and the guy in the room next to us yelled "with other women bitch!"
Peanut butter balls.
IF YOU EVEN COME NEAR MY BALLS AGAIN I SWEAR TO GOD
I bet Billy Ray Cyrus wishes he had pulled out now....
Is it bad that I want a job purely so I can buy drugs with without feeling like I am sacrificing my future?
Why do you think I have a job?
would you like to venture to the magical clitoris forest?
i'm pretty sure you can't sue someone for "Taking a shit on my kitchen floor."
Video footage says last night I reincarnated as stripper Shania Twain... Man, I feel like a (slutty) woman.
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