A joint and a Nerds Rope = breakfast of champions for the unemployed
I'm pretty sure I'm almost gay. Like, I'd do it if I had no choice. Like, if i were in prison I'd try it.
I think misery doesn't even think of me as company anymore. I'm an unofficial roommate.
his profile picture is a blurry one of him holding a beer. i recognized him instantly.
I took my pants off in the cab and tried to bite his ear. Not going oout for awhile
I am in fact going to raffle myself off for a night. If you are interested in buying a ticket let me know. $10 a ticket.
True that.. I am going to ride a gold plated unicorn across a field of cocaine and coach purses when I graduate.
That was beautiful.
I'm really having trouble focusing on shark week with this erection
i made sure not to drool on your bed by putting my hoodie on backwards and swaddling my face in the hood
420 is off to a bad start. Mark wake/baked WAY too much, and he has spent over $50 on the claw machine in the grocery store.
She jumped on a table and took off her shirt and started yelling things that no one understood. For being 3, she has a dead on impression of a drunk party girl.
Had sex in a cemetery last night during a thunderstorm. I feel like my goth points have skyrocketed
She's going to be the first to die of too much illness. Not even super bad stuff like cancer but like for having a cold at the same time as a sore throat and chlamydia or something. Just too much diseases.
IT IS EARTH DAY, RECORD STORE DAY, 4/20 EVE, AND SATURDAY ALL AT THE SAME TIME!
She was talking about how a garden gnome was hitting on her the whole night. We thought she was just that high, but turned out the gnome was that guy in the weird hat.
Randomize
