How long do you think herpes can live on chapstick?
did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
Now he's talking about how he's writing in a journal because he doesn't remember "his thought patterns when he was in elementary and that's distressing". I'm walking home. Fuck this.
I have eleven tally marks and an infinity sign drawn on my wrist in permanent marker. Senior bar crawl stole my liver.
After waking up today, I would like to find the Jesus preachers on campus to ask for help in asking for forgiveness to God.
it took me 7 solid minutes to realize "egggGSaucetingf" meant "exhausting"
when you agree to fuck a guy it does by NO means make it okay for his roommate to hide in the closet with doritos and watch
All i really wanna do tonight is get drunk with you and dance on tables. is that too much to ask?
I feel like someone poured gasoline and bleach in my nose and lit it on fire.
Why! I don't feel that at all!!!! I feel jipped
Did you drink ALL that 151??
No. We drank all the jaeger... Then used the 151 to start the fire. We're also out of paper towels... And your hairspray is flammable.
Pulling on my sock literally just took me 5 minutes.. The hangover is real
I was so high last night I honestly think my tears were medicinal
This time tomorrow I will be drunk and in a voodoo shop
I have a weird question... did you bite my back last night?
He was shirtless in my yard saying he was jesus
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