worst. lesbian. ever. i'm not sure she knows a clit from a pencil eraser.
Masterbating to gospel music is like god cheering on your orgasm
love makes seman taste better
everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
I making dinner, so you might want to actually come home tonight.
oh, you finally did the dishes then?
No, bought new ones.
When he came he sounded like a flock of birds hitting puberty
Like if god were to send me a cock shot, that's what it would look like.
You have to come over we all bought drinking hats. Mine has a turtle on it. Side note: somehow someone got their hands on 50 candied apples and we need to eat them...
A shower wasnt enough to wash off the shame but at least it took care off the blood.
started my period, we have to try again next week
if we have anymore sex before that my dick is gonna fall off. that is in no way a complaint
No piss test, hell yeah
FALSE ALARM. PISS TEST. I NEED YOUR PISS.
Yeah I'd rather get obliterated at home.
Same here. I'd like to ensure that I won't get pissed on.
He was so drunk we almost didn't even make it to his place because he didn't know where he lived
I was like sure, i'll have a drink or two to end the night early. Next thing i know theres a ton of dudes in my house and like 3 gallons of wine. I cant do anything in moderation.
It should be perfectly legal to tase anyone not wearing a mask.
Randomize
