This is how scared I get when I ride roller coasters. And how scared I was when I had to poop when I had herpes.
shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.
you dont need a face to have sex
It got to the point that I had to make flashcards with their name on the front and dick pics on the back.
Why do they give me cups on $8 pitcher night? I HAVE A PITCHER.
Just stop talking to douche bags. How do you manage to attract every asshole within a 100 mile radius?
If i could answer that i wouldn't be so afraid to move to a more populated area
Now I'm at the gym and I never want to leave. It's a combo of adderall and endorphins and I don't want it to go away
I ended up passing out on the shitter for like an hour with mcds smoothie all over my face
I need to stop ravaging the freshman dorm like a virginity-snatching dragon.
I've realized that I'm going to have to wake and bake every morning to make it through the summer without killing someone. This is ridiculous.
so when he he finally wandered back into the room it was with a pound of cream cheese which he ate in 5 minutes flat and then passed out
Yeah. I woke up in an awkward three way spoon with him and his sister. Tequila!
Let's just say it was like a porno version of Aladdin....
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
I blacked out. Broke into their house. Took a shit, and left. This is why you can't leave me unattended.
Dude just saw some some guy puke out of a car window on the highway going to school.
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