I have got to lose weight!! Apparently no one wants to fuck a fat chick with herpes.
Do you think there is vodka in heaven?
you let me eat a milky way from your vagina. G is not lettin you hang out for eternity
The project manager just came into talk to me for the first time and I had justed googled best drum solo ever and couldn't X out of the screen.
All I remember is drinking vodka out of tupperware.
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
Today's work quote "if I looked like you, I'd be sitting on everyones face"
The last thing I remember was doing a line in the shape of Texas
How the hell do you leave a party with a kitten? It's missing and everyone knows it was you.
so gross sitting on a warm chair at a restaurant..you just know a fat person was sitting there shoveling food into their face for hours.
She really is something else.
Words cannot describe what though. The best way to describe her is to say it like watching a bear and a whale have sex. You don't know why it's happening or how. But it's rather funny and you can't look away.
It's been a long time since I got "Talk about Glen's enormous penis" drunk
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
I FINALLY GET TO MASTURBATE. SO EXCITED.
How did you tell her we met?
I told her that we met at the sex shop down the street, I thought it would be the most reasonable explanation.
Pride log, day two. Noticing more bruises and scrapes. Liver functions probably very lowered.
Randomize
