its family weekend so i'm givin my little bro a tour of everywhere ive thrown up on campus
he ruins everything I try to do including his roommates
We're playing a drinking game to 'how to train your dragon'. has it really come to this?
There was an ice luge. Lets just leave it at that.
I'm on a mission. But just to make out with him so his relationship collapses and he is single when I come back in April.
I am wearing two different shoes and just swallowed my gum. Wake the fuck up and bang the bartender already.
And for those of you keeping score at home this is the 7th time I've found Casey passed out head first in a bowl of chips at a party I didn't even know she was at
I gotta say, I do way better with the ladies than I do the men. So if it turns out being gay is a choice, then I'm going to go ahead and choose it.
The next time you fuck up, your grandma sees your dick pics
AMERICA LOVES YOU. RIDE THAT DICK LIKE PAUL REVERE RODE HIS HORSE SO MANY YEARS AGO
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
I'm not dealing with this wiskey dick shit, 2016 is the year of hard dicks
yeah but really his dick tasted like soap. like i was blowing a bar of soap
Three times. Three times I left home yesterday in search for sex, and three times I returned un-orgasmed.
The man built me a fort. Of course he got laid.
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