How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
listen. just hotwire a car, take off the license plate, make up a new one on a sheet of paper and go the speed limit. i do it like, at least 3x a week.
I have no idea who these bands are he's listening to. If his current playlist was a pandora station, however, it would be titled "music for closet cock gobblers"
in respone to your voicemail you left me on saturday, yes i had gone to bed and no i was not still drinking at 5am
She's cheated on every boyfriend she's ever had with the same guy. She's like a slutty yo-yo.
Tinkerbell just flew up to me and tickled my balls. What the fuck did we smoke?
thanks for the 52 voicemails of you and crystal reciting the pleg of allegance
By getting lucky do you mean I get one of your incredible BJs or you not killing me by the end of dinner?
You know where a good place to spend summer is? In your head. High as shit. It doesn't matter where you are.
Everything was cool until I tried to photo bomb those Hells Angels, then it's all a blank
You think you're smart. You're pretending to be asleep to save yourself from my hormonal pms mood swings. Unfortunately that only works against bears.
You know that girl that climbed through my window and got in my bed with me and fucked me? It turns out she was real and has a real boyfriend who is real pissed
Maybe he injected his testicle?
I don't want to sleep with any other woman but you but I want to try this whole mother daughter thing that would be nuts
Bro i just made a pipe out of a mechanical pencil and the top to an eye drop bottle. Does that make me some kind of pot god?
Randomize
