so i hit rock bottom, god threw me a shovel. i continued to dig.
moving back to school this early was a terrible idea we already used up our bail fund
and his room smelled like strippers, childrens tears, and fear
some dude is stoned out of his mind in my calc class. just shouted that the teacher was a genius cause he got rid of so many numbers
When I came in she was screaming "boundaries!" at the cat because it was trying to eat her pizza rolls.
she just came into my room, drunkenly shoved six dollars into my bra and told me to spend it on chicken wings.
I got a phone call from security asking me to do my laundry wearing more than a blanket next time.
i think i had to give the cab driver my id to get home last night because i couldnt talk.
He tried eating fireworks, to stop him being hungover in the morning. Where do you keep finding these people?!
Never backflip into an above ground pool. I think the gash will be smaller by Monday though.
Sorry I invoked the "everyones getting smacked including myself policy last night"
Just had a flashback to Friday. Definitely had my hands in someone's bra. Definitely wasn't mine.
this night just went from meh to biblical thanks to drunk naked yahtzee
Remember last NYE when after the 9th shot of tequila you went on full crazy mode and made out with the 50 y/o doorkeeper? and he called you the next day?
I sent him nudes while he is at work because I am an evil human being.
Randomize
