drank two beers while on the toilet at home during lunch break. new high or new low, not sure
Dude love is like an itch. You fuckin scratch it, then it itches more, then you scratch it and it itches more, and before you know it, there is semen everywhere.
you are insane
We had sex this morning and after she goes, " So are we going to do something for Valentines Day?"
you gave the police officer your chanel wallet and said 'just keep it the i.d. is fake too'.
I need a second opinion on who's blood is in my car.
He drew a face on his balls with a sharpie. It was like giving head to a unicorn.
your love of good penises attached to ugly faces is disgusting and slightly disturbing.
By the way I got my period today. No NHL babies for me.
Not as much as my roommate, who is in the middle of one of the pictures throwing a lawn chair at a cop car lol.
Dude come to her party. Someone just took a body shot of rubbing alcohol
I'm developing all these feelings it's disgusting.
At least you didn't sleep with Ashley's uncle.
This toilet bowl is my home.
well I ran around the park drunk with a plastic baby and fell, all while screaming "I WILL PROTECT YOU CARLOS", yeah there's video
I’m gonna slowly take you in my mouth and push you deep into my throat so my lips are right up against your body and then I’m gonna fucking bite your shit off if one more of our friends shows me a snap you took while I was giving you head. Are we clear?
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