Im going to need an iv of taco bell after this.
I feel like my teeth are sweating.
Hello you've reached the get a clue corp. Our business hours are from take a hint to figure it out, eastern standard time. If you prefer to leave a message, don't, call back when you're not crazy, fat, and annoying.
No need to get angry I'm just tryin to get my door back
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
Your cousin just asked the bartender to start a round of vagina shots. Not body shots. Vagina shots. We're taking her out more often.
I refuse to fuck a guy who needs a coozy for his beer. NOT EVEN IN DESPERATE TIMES LIKE THESE.
Kid got laid mid-party wearin a fuzzy hat with ears and 40's taped to his bear paws... wtf
Suppose hypothetically u received a request for face time communication with a gentleman who looked astonishingly like a penis. Would you indulge him in conversation? Hypothetically of course.
Dude, for twins they have shockingly different blowjob styles.
STOP FUCKING MY SISTERS!!!!
It's 10:15 on a Wednesday night and my dick is covered in pop rocks. How's your Wednesday going?
You don't know how skeptical I was about letting a guy with braces go down on me
You've got until 8 and then I'm kicking down your door and pouring a beer down your ass via funnel
i'm extremely hungover on the ski bus and the driver is playing abba. this. is. not. okay.
I just realized u compared me to a coconut
Randomize
