im insabelyl wasted and diont know if ill yexyed tou. call me
Of course im so fucked up sarah. I fight away tornadoes.
Sad Moment: I only had enough $ at 711 to buy chips or salsa. I chose salsa and took a plastic spoon
I picked my nose. Flicked it. I heard it hit something. Next thing I know, it's floating around in my wine glass.
you said your puke was red because you were proud to be an american.
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
I have to collect my sorority sisters from greek row... I hate how being dd is a night and morning job
i don't really know how much tequila is too much
Quick question: how long can sperm live in a rug?
You never did explain why you were in wal-mart with a wok full of popcorn.
Just had a memory of you pretending to be a begging dog putting your head on my lap while I fed you. Great night to try a new drug.
I'm going to get like 25 drinks at their wedding and just leave them sitting around or give them to hobos.
There is a car windscreen wiper in my handbag... Not my car's, not ok.
Don't date the locals. They're all tainted.
i just called dibs on the taxi driver at the bar that isnt drinking. im a grown up
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