SECOND walk of shame from the westside Hilton, SECOND foreign family w kids staring at me in my dress, glitter purse, spiky heels and booze breath. I said I was going to church. More confusion.
Booty call?
Dude you don't even follow my twitter
Hi, my name's audrey!
Max?
Sorry, this girl is phone-stealing drunk.
My mom called me and we started arguing as usual. I finally screamed at her "I HEAR YOU AND THAT 30 YEAR OLD FUCKING!" and hung up. She hasn't called back yet. I win.
There r osticjed everywhere
Currently separating the burrito I just stuffed in my purse from the weed in my half smoken bowl that was already in it. My what the fuck moment beats yours.
this is a reminder to untag myself in the picture of me flashing the photographer in the morning.
My kindergarten teacher served me... All coming full circle
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
thank god we only have to drink eggnog and rum once a year. It taste like shit.
It's official, there's a sex tape of me floating around some high school
He wants me to hook up with his fiance while he watches. Text you later with how it goes.
You haven't lived until you've snorted coke from a Pharaoh's hand baby
Are you missing a tooth after last night? Because I found one in my coat pocket...along with what smells like dried jäger and a package of deer jerky.
Uh not that I recall.
Oh wait nvm. It's mine. Yeup, definitely my tooth.
I'm in the upstairs bathroom. I went to the bathroom after class and realized this is not a shit I want to have publicly. I ran home. We can go to lunch, just give me a min
Randomize
