He wanted to take me out and said we could "go huntin in the woods."
yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
Wtf. Who made this Big Mac, Helen Keller?
similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
he said that he wanted to outsmoke the rain, I don't know what that means but I'm gonna go help him
Just saw ur booking photo. Love that u were already wearing orange. Its like u knew
Just got blown in a rental car. I need to get rear ended more often
Oh my fucking god I saw the pictures. What the mother fucking fuck. Destroy the pictures. Destroy the fucking pictures.
Please confirm the destruction of the pictures. NOW.
I asked the subway guy how many cookies he thought I could smuggle into the bar. He said it looked like a 6 packer. he was correct
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
I almost died in that meeting. Nearly dried up and blew away in the pure powder form of boredom
I know that feel bro
My trash can accurately represents my weekend: Bojangles wrappers and magnums.
just wanted to eat pizza off his dick so he let me and he can never forget it
Is it sad to eat a candy bra by yourself?
Never drinking before a 6am train again. Just threw up at boarder control and had to pretend it was cause I was pregnant and not cause I trashed.
You make Europe seem so glamorous.
Randomize