when did we get to this "texting at random" level on friendship?
the sex was "jacking off to playboy" bad.
The hookah bar is playing i'm on a boat. I believe in god again.
Just tried on my bathing suit for the first time this year. Had to drink a beer to numb the pain.
we bought a duck. we're keeping him in our dorm room. don't ever try to tell me you've had a better freshman year than me.
I want to break his glasses with my pelvis.
So it's national ass day?! I love October. No bra last Saturday and now ass day. This is my month. God is dedicating this October to me!
This message brought to you by inappropriate slogans. Cotton candy, melting in your mouth like boners.
He really only has clothes, like 4 boogie boards, and a bong here.
Keep in mind this was 2012... YOLO was a very new concept.
I just want him to get into an accident where he's horribly disfigured but otherwise fine so he's not so freaking handsome
So high I legit spent 20mins in the shower just holding my tits cuz they feel bigger than normal.
Great, now even dream!me is a drunken borderline mess.
Don't do him, he's a Dolphins fan! A FUCKING DOLPHINS FAN!
I'm going to draw something on my chest and I need to incorporate my nipples. Any ideas?
Randomize
