What started out as a threesome has become me sitting here watching them have sex... Can I get a ride home?
Where are you? I just made a vodka + cranberry & I’m going to drive there & throw it in your face
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
There are many reasons why he shouldn't come over. And each one is longer than his penis.
ill give you a picture of me naked for $5. im desperate.
ya, but you'll graduate college with a higher education. I'm looking at at least two addictions, an abortion, and a few weeks jail time.
We both bought three foot bongs...going to race to see who can smoke a mile first.
I have 4 passes to the spa here, walking around with a robe on and putting cucumber slices on my penis. You guys should come hang out here. It's very relaxing
I just can't even fathom the crazy and I work at a mental hospital.
I just heard myself say the sentence "I'm gonna go to the bank then take a nap". 8 year old me just slapped my present self through the space-time continuum for being an old fuck.
I haven't heard from him yet. He's either still asleep (which is entirely plausible..... There wasn't much sleeping happening last night) or he's robbing me blind. But I have renters insurance, so either way, I'm ok with it.
So anyways, we returned the toilet paper and decided to use the money for taco bell and slurpees instead...
We could just stay sober.
No! We tried that once.
It sucked.
I mean his penis was perfect in pictures but its even more perfect inside me
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