So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
He dumped me and I don't wanna fuck his best friend for revenge. Is this what maturity feels like?
Currently microwaving whipped cream to make white Russians and hotboxing the kitchen while this random kid is dancing in the corner.
You had the genius idea to tape beer to the celing fan. There goes his security deposit. He is gonna be fuckin pissed.
Got him to take a shot from the drip pan on the George Forman. He's gone now.
I will never in my life forget you letting the cat lick your tongue
Promise me you won't have sex in my room
I can't promise you that, but I promise you that I'll try
Might want to in your tub tho. That thing is fucking huge.
you took a picture of the hospital bathroom and sent it to me
I didnt want you guys to know I needed to puke, so I just nonchalantly did in my solo cup and threw it out the window
She said if her future children dont have blue eyes she wont love them
I'm not in it for just the sex. If I wanted mediocre dick once a week I would have stayed with one of my exes.
Almost lost a vagina lip in the great shave of '16
I just brought her a lipstick taser. So just remember that the next time you get smart with her
The adults are the big ones right?
We found you with your penis in the vacum hose crying softly...
Randomize
