I dont think punching her boob is the type of reverse psychology that will get her to blow you.
You thought last year was bad... a guy dressed as a clown showed up with cocaine
He woke up in the ambulance thinking he was still in the club.
I get off at the next exit which doesn't have a shoulder, a guy is riding my ass so I cant stop. I think I got as much puke on his car as on mine.
Just make sure my intervention has a theme...
Hey, I got 20% of the people home that I was responsible for. I can't be expected to do much more.
And there was a legally blind kid in a ref costume doing surprisingly well at beer pong who was passing out business cards
Nvm, he just almost drank his drink from last night, his drink that has the condom in it. Kinda answers my question.
Is it bad that I feel proud to be the first one to puke in the apartment? And I did it in style?
You straight up painted the counter with steak, tequila and beer. You owe me a knew toothbrush.
I live vicariously through you. No one mistakes me for a hooker anymore. I look like a stay at home mom of three. On bad days of four.
I can't help the fact that i'm turned on by white boys that look like Jesus
How many drinks/blunt hits do you think I could get if I wore an "it's my birthday" shirt
congrats on being the token straight people in our group.
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
She’s the kind of asshole whose face I want to put on a T-shirt just so I can go outside and burn it.
Randomize
