If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
I kept grabbing at Stephanie's boobs because I thought the leopard spots on her dress were popcorn.
She just stuck her hand down the strippers pants. Shit just got real.
I'm pregaming for my hair cut. Working two jobs definately taught me how to use my time wisely...
All I want is tacobeell and your body
that's my favorite sentence you've ever said.
Mcdonalds hasn't even finished serving breakfast yet and u two are getting drunk?
Left and drinking by a bar by myself. Everyone is in pajamas. I'm in a tuxedo. This is my life.
I was busy. But now I'm about to consume alcohol and chicken. We shall see where this takes us. Maybe to the moon, maybe to the floor. I have no idea.
Hooked up to multiple episodes of Even Stevens last night. What the fuck.
He called us the '3 Amigos' and told us if hos ex wife came we had to jump the porch railing and hide in the bushes.
After getting all 4 of my wisdom teeth removed I asked my dentist how much better would I be at head
i have nothing going on in my life. unless a toxic love triangle with netflix and jack daniels counts.
Finding out you're not a mother on Mother's Day >>>
My cat took a shit on the guy who passed out in the bathtub
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